Leo's Unhelpful Guide to Organic Life Forms
by Drawing On Converse
Summary: Leo Valdez does not like dealing with people. After all, you can't just stick a screw in to fix them. Before, he's always just ran away. Now, he has to stay. Is it possible that Leo can find someone with just as many issues, and just as few answers?
1. Sticking in Screws

I hate problems that I can't solve. They make me feel inadequate, like if I stuck some new screws in everything would be fixed. But my luck has always sucked, so of course not all things can be fixed with screws. Humans, for example. Ever tried sticking a nail into a human? Let me tell you, it ends with tears. Humans have emotions, which complicate everything. And right now, I have a very human problem. In fact, one most teenage males have.

I have no idea how to deal with a crying girl.

Piper was inside the engine room, where I guess she thought she would have privacy. Not a very good plan, if you ask me. Of course I would come down here, the Argo II doesn't run itself!

Whatever. Doesn't matter how she got there, I still have to deal with her. I walked in between the unstained rafters to my workbench. Piper was on the floor in front of the workbench cabinets with my tool belt swinging dangerously near her noggin. The pajama bottoms she was wearing only went to mid calf, and her t- shirt was rumpled. But her hair still shone from the glare of an uncovered light bulb, and she was still beautiful. I'm not attracted to her or anything, thank the gods, but I once again was jealous of Jason. Why did he get to have a drop dead gorgeous, smart, and witty girl like him? Thalia won't even _look_ at me. Khione tried to kill me. Seriously, if there's a Hunter's of Artemis for boys, I would consider joining. I sat down on the floor in front of drawers next to Piper.

"Hey, Beauty Queen, something up? Lost a pageant?" I gave her a hopefully convincing smile. I didn't want to make her feel like I didn't care if she was upset. After all, she is my friend.

"Don't call me that! And in what world would I have entered into a pageant?" Her voice was choked, and a bit lower than normal. But at least she was trying.

"If someone had enough blackmail... You never know. But seriously, what's wrong? And don't give me that _I'm fine_ crap, 'cause you're crying in the engine room at ten o'clock at night." I scooted myself so I was seated directly in front of her bare feet.

"Well, I wanted to be alone... No, not alone really. Just somewhere Jason couldn't find me like this. He's holding back something about that Reyna girl, I just know it. They were not just colleagues. But I don't want to ruin any of his past friendships... And I just don't know anything right now." Piper tucked her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them, like she was holding herself together. Of _course_, this would be about Jason.

"Well, that brings you to my level of intelligence. The not knowing anything thing. I'm not gonna argue with your Aphrodite instincts about the Reyna girl. But I know that if anything had really happened between Jason and her, he would have told us. And I'm pretty sure he likes you, Pipes," I stated, awkwardly patting her knee.

"You think so?" The crying had stopped, and she looked hopeful. A braid swung across her face and settled on her nose.

"Psh, yeah, of course! Honestly, he sure as heck doesn't make googly- eyes at _me! _How long has this been bothering you?" I raised an eyebrow. Well, I _tried_ to raise an eyebrow. Probably looked like a pigeon with a twitch.

"Ever since Jason got his memories back. I didn't want to say anything, 'cause Annabeth lost Percy and they were actually dating." Jeez, for the daughter of the love goddess, Piper was pretty clueless. I'm pretty sure _Clarissa _knew Jason liked her._  
><em>  
>"Seriously, Piper, you have friends. I could see not telling your cabin mates, cuz then it would be all, <em>'Piper lovessss Jason? Isn't Jasper such a sweet couple name? They are sooo cute!'<em> But you can talk to me whenever. And Annabeth might want to hear about it. You're the only one who has the slightest idea what she's dealing with right now. What I'm saying is, don't bottle your feelings up."

I ran my hands through my hair, but they got stuck in the tangled curls after an inch. I can't pull of anything vaguely suave. Piper's voice was now completely clear. "You think I should talk to Annabeth?" I nodded, and said,

"Yes!" in an exasperated tone. Piper smiled, tucked the braid on her nose behind her ear, and got up. She reached out a hand.

"Thanks, Valdez, that was a pep talk worthy of Coach Hedge. Now, let's get to bed. You have a lot of work to do, captaining the _Argo II_ tomorrow." I took her hand and pulled myself up.

"Should I be insulted?" I asked, brushing the dust from the seat of my pants. "No thanks, I'll hit the sack in a few minutes. I'm just going to clean up from my project today. Never got around to it before dinner." I nodded my head at the mess that was my workbench. Three blueprints for the _Argo_, my tool belt, a Philip screwdriver, adjustable wrench, Greek fire containers_ (Caution! Open at your own risk!)_, and a half eaten sandwich were just some of the miscellaneous crap I had thrown onto the desk. Six months ago, I wouldn't have bothered to clean it. But with Annabeth getting on me about how organization makes for faster work, I've started to tidy up. Believe me, that girl can lecture like nobody's business. When I finally consented to clean up the space, she made me cool engraved metal labels. Which kinda made up for the 1 hour and 43 minutes I was forced to listen to her. Whoever that Percy guy is, he must be a saint.

"Okay. Throw that sandwich away, I think I just saw something crawl out of it. 'Night, Leo," Piper smiled and shrugged one shoulder before walking away. I sat down on my stool and rested my chin in my palms. It seemed like I was the only one without any real problems on this ship. Annabeth, as OCD and touchy as she is, must really be missing Percy. I've heard some stories, and he sounds like an awesome dude. And he might not even remember Annabeth. Piper is afraid she will lose Jason to an unknown rival at Camp Jupiter. Jason is going to be seeing all his old friends tomorrow, all the people that he cares about, and that must be making him anxious. But I don't know how he feels.

All my problems are slightly less tangible. They're general problems, ones I've been having for years. My mom is dead, I can't control my fire powers, and I look less _Mario Lopez_ and more _Santa's evil elf_. And I can't deal with emotions.

_But_, I thought, lifting my head, _I didn't to that bad of a job tonight. _

Give yourself a pat on the back, Valdez.

**A/N: Word count (not counting author's note): 1182**

**Leo does not get enough love. He is the best of the HoO characters. His humor was probably the only thing that kept me awake in TLH. I hope I didn't butcher him too badly. XD This will be a friendship fic between Leo and Reyna, ending when he leaves for The Prophecy of Seven. I hope to update this regularly, in addition to editing **_**Fellow Pranksters. **_**Leave a review!**


	2. Repair Boy

"_When I walk on by, girls be looking like…"_

I slammed my radio alarm off before any of the other occupants of the ship could hear it. I need to fix that so it goes from a playlist. _Next project_, I added onto my mental to do list. It shouldn't be too hard; just need to set it up to download songs and tinker with the hard drive a bit to save lists… Maybe while we were sailing on to Greece so I wouldn't appear to be a seventh wheel. I rolled out of bed, found a Camp Half- Blood t-shirt on the ground that smelt clean, and a pair of jeans from the foot of my bed. I looked at my hair in the little mirror to the left of the door, and considered combing it. _Nah, too much work_. I shoved my feet into sneakers and continued to try and wiggle them on as I walked up the narrow stairwell to the deck. Annabeth, of course, was already organizing maps and such near the wheel. The wheel was mostly for decoration while we were flying, the rudder would be used to determine direction and Jason's power plus the sails would push us along.

"Hey," I yawned, plopping down on the bench beside Annabeth. She scooted away slightly.

"Good morning. And brush your teeth," she wrinkled her nose. Oh, I knew I forgot to do something.

"Well, not all of us will be making out with our boyfriends later today," I retorted. Annabeth's face crumpled. Shoot.

"Yeah," she said. It sounded like a ferret had been shoved down her throat.

"Annabeth, Percy will remember you. From what I heard, you guys went through a ton together and understood each other well. And you obviously love him a lot," I attempted to comfort her. At least she wasn't full on crying, like Piper. Does Jason or even Percy have to deal with as many crying girls as me? The injustice.

"Thanks, Leo. I need to be strong; I don't want the Romans to perceive our camp as weak. But Jason had a fake girlfriend when he got here, and now they're almost a real couple. What if Hera did the same thing with Percy?" Annabeth sucked her lips into her mouth and tears started to pool in her eyes.

"Well, Jason wasn't dating anybody. And I don't think Hera would _dare_ to mess up the saviors of Olympus's love lives!" I pulled out the savior of the world card on her. But it just made her look more pensive.

"Hera really hates me, though. She actually likes Jason, or as close as she can get to liking someone, and look what she did to him," Annabeth licked her lips.

"What, set him up with an awesome girl? When you put it like that, Hera sounds absolutely angelic!" Annabeth chuckled a little. Score! It was almost impossible to make her laugh.

"Those two just need to get over themselves and start dating. It's pathetic how they're pining after each other. Though I guess that's kind of hypocritical of me, seeing how long it took Percy and I to ask each other out," Annabeth tilted her head to the side, and her blond ponytail caught the light. It might have been the first time since I knew her that she mentioned Percy's name and didn't look upset. I'm getting good at this cheering-up thing. I should start charging per therapy session.

"Agreed. But for now, we need to get this ship ready to roll!" I wiggled my upper body and moved my hands in a _cha- cha_ motion. Annabeth rolled her eyes, but she looked happy. We spent the next hour organizing maps and coiling ropes.

"This would be so much easier with Percy. He just had to say what he wanted the ship to do, and it happened. Like, 'Main sail, up!' It was great," Annabeth sighed as she stood on her tip- toes to grab the folded sail and string it up. Right about then, Piper and Jason straggled up the stairwell.

"Took you guys long enough. Were there things _occupying_ you in bed?" I waggled my eyebrows and grinned. Jason looked confused as to why Piper was glaring at me. Oh, the innocence.

"Let's go to breakfast," Piper grumbled. Definitely not a morning person.

OoooOoooO

"Okay, five minutes until go time!" I shouted from the middle of the deck. Campers were swarming all around me, trying to set up last minute stuff, say goodbye, and get off the ship so they didn't have to brave Camp Jupiter. Annabeth strode over to me with five maps stacked in her arms and hair falling into her eyes.

"Hey, Leo, you should probably send a message to Camp Jupiter, give them a heads up. Take this," she lifted the pile up a little and I grabbed the top sheet.

"What do I do?" I called to her retreating back. She turned around and looked at me like I was the dumbest person in the world.

"You tap it and say, 'Activate' then say what you want to. Tap it again to stop it and it will send to Percy automatically. It's like an IM on paper," Annabeth rolled her eyes and continued on her merry way. Well, excuse me. That was just _so_ obvious. I waited until we had finally managed to lift off the ground. Camp was shrinking down to the size of a Lego set. Everyone had finally stopped waving to our friends. _Friends_, I thought, _Huh. I made friends. _I guess I beat the odds. I headed down to the engine room, with Piper following behind me to the galley down the hallway.

"Want anything?" she asked.

"Yeah, a PB&J would be nice," I replied. I loved PB&J. And they were the only thing Piper could cook. It's weird that the best chef on this ship is a guy. I set the manila paper on the middle of my now cleared workbench. I reached out a finger and tapped it.

"Activate," I said in my best Darth Vader voice. Everything within 1 inch of the sides started to shimmer. _Wow, it actually does look like an IM_. Then I realized I was standing there, grinning like an idiot. _Pull it together, Valdez._

"Hey, this is Leo, and I'm speaking to you on behalf of the _Argo II_ crew. I'm the…" I realized I didn't know what I was called. I turned my head towards the galley. "Hey, Piper!" I shouted, "What am I? Admiral, or Captain, or…"

"Repair Boy!" she answered. Well, way to make me look like an idiot. I hope they didn't hear that.

"The Supreme Commander Dude," I finished. Yeah, I like it. Supreme Commander Dude Leo. Has a ring to it. "Well, anyways, we'll be landing a banging warship on your camp in, oh, I don't know, about three hours? So yeah, if you could try not to blast us out of the sky, that would be great. See you soon!" I gave a cheerful wave and last grin, then tapped the middle of the paper. It dissolved like water vapor, leaving the faint smell of a water fall behind. _Not bad_, I nodded. _Annabeth couldn't have done a better job herself._

**A/N: **_**word count: 1217 **_**And so, they head for camp! I wonder what Annabeth would have said if she left the message… probably bored them to tears with facts about the structure of the ship. I love her; I hope I didn't botch her character too badly! You know what? If you leave a review, you can let me know... **_*****__**hint hint* **_**To avoid copyright stuff, and to aid my being lazy, I did not directly copy the wording of Leo's message. This is about what I remember him saying.**


	3. Pleather Couches

Finally. The moment we've been waiting for the last eight months. Landing in Camp Jupiter. Everyone was running around the ship like a crazy person, and it looked like Annabeth had brushed her hair. I guess miracles do happen. We were about 15 minutes away from touch down in something called _The Field of Mars_. Clarisse would be psyched that her dad's Roman counter-part had an entire field named after him! I joined Annabeth on the starboard edge of the deck. She had her arms crossed over the railing with her chin resting on them, and she stared out wistfully into the distance. That's when it really hit me for the first time: Annabeth was _young_. Only about a year older than me. It seemed like an alien idea, because she always acted so mature and in control. But right now, staring out into the smog of San Francisco, she looked like an 8 year old in need of a hug. I leaned down on my elbows next to her. We stayed in that position for about 30 seconds, wallowing in what some idiots call _companionable silence_ before I snapped.

"So what's up?" I asked Annabeth. She looked slightly annoyed at me breaking her train of thought, and got a little crease between her eyebrows. To my great surprise, she answered my question.

"Thinking about home. My dad's house is right around here. It's just that, during Christmas, when I was visiting my family, Percy was _right there. _Not ten minutes away. I was _so close_!" Annabeth pounded a fist on the wooden railing, and sounded a bit guilty as well as angry. Great. I get to play therapist to her for the second time today.

"How could you have known about the Roman Camp being in San Fran? Jason didn't remember the location till the beginning of January. The Mist was probably making you not see it. Besides, Percy might not have even gotten there yet," she licked her lips and nodded her head a little. "Now cough up." I held out my hand to her in a _gimme_ motion. Annabeth looked at me like I was insane.

"What the Hades are you talking about?" She scooted away a bit.

"I'm talking about the fact that I had to play therapist to you twice today, and to Piper yesterday. I decided to start charging for my services. One drachma per comforting situation. Pay up," I made the hand motion again. Annabeth cracked up. Like, really cracked up. She was bent over double, one hand on her stomach for support, and stayed that way for a good twenty seconds. She finally started wheezing for air.

"That is so something Percy would do. You guys'll get along great. You're both total idiots!" Annabeth's face was split into a jaw-numbing smile, and she was still giggling a bit. I was honored by the comparison, but slightly insulted.

"Well," I huffed, pushing myself back, "I'll let you off this one time. But don't come crying to me again unless you got cash. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to build myself a pleather couch." And I mock- stalked back to the engine room, Annabeth's peals of laughter following me seeming like a good omen.

OooooOooooO

"Yes! Success! Ownage people! That right there is a perfect landing! Be jealous!" I shouted in pure happiness, then put my hands in the air and danced around in circles.

"It was very nice Leo. But _calm_ the _Hades down_!" Piper grabbed hold of my shoulders and shook me. A sheepish grin spread across my face.

"Sorry. Got a little caught up in the moment. But it's not every day you land a freaking gigantic warship _perfectly_!" I punched the air one last time. Piper, Annabeth and Jason all rolled their eyes.

"Come on, Flameboy. Time to meet the Romans," Jason made a face at me, but I could tell he was trying not to smile.

"Watch yourself, Sparky," I pointed a finger and narrowed my eyes at him. Then I walked over to the port side and flipped open a black plastic case. I pushed the red button inside, and wooden stairs slid from the side of the ship, going all the way down. The other three were looking at me apprehensively. It was a long way to slip and fall, I guess. And it looked like the Roman's had weapons out, which would not make for a soft landing.

"Fine," I sighed. "I'll go first." I vaulted over the railing and scrambled down the steps, trying not to look at the crowd of people watching me. I dropped to my feet, straightened my shirt, and tried to look cool in front of hundreds of not-so-friendly looking Romans. They were all dressed in armor, except for two figures about my age standing at the front of the crowd. One was a boy, one was a girl, and they both had dark hair and were wearing purple togas. That must mean they're praetors. The boy had his arms slung around a pretty African American girl and a rather stocky Chinese boy. Piper followed my descent, then Annabeth, then Jason. At the sight of the golden haired boy landing on the ground and facing the mob, an audible gasp went through them. The weapons were lowered. The girl in the toga called out,

"Approach, friends of Rome." Nervously, we started walking forward in a straight line across. When we were about fifty feet away, Annabeth's eyes focused in on the boy and her face crumpled for a moment before becoming a mask of indifference. Wow, so Percy was a praetor. While the girl praetor, who must be the Reyna Jason told us about, was standing military straight and her braid had not one stray hair, Percy slipped his arms from around his two friends. He was shifting nervously side to side. Still approaching, I saw him give a questioning glance to Reyna. Annabeth shook slightly next to me. Reyna answered his glance with a slight nod and roll to her eyes. Suddenly, he took off. Percy was sprinting full speed towards us, toga billowing behind him.

"Annabeth!" He shouted with absolute ecstasy in his voice. I was right, he remembered her. Percy hurtled into Annabeth, picked her up, and spun her in about five circles. There were titters among the Romans. When he finally set her down, Annabeth kept her arms around him and looked up at his face with tears in her eyes.

"Do you remember?" Her voice was quivering. I have never seen Ms. Organized so frightened.

"I never forgot," Percy smile threatened to split his face in half. Annabeth, who was normally the most composed of us all, threw her arms around his neck and started kissing him. I was surprised that she could show so much passion. After a few seconds, I wolf- whistled and they broke apart.

"That's not as bad as what Clarisse did last time," Percy looked at me, his eyes sparkling. "She got the camp to throw us in the lake." He didn't seem too upset about it. I grinned back and looked away. I noticed that his two friends and Reyna had reached us. Reyna tilted her head to the side, and I realized she was gorgeous. In an untouchable, cold way. She was just my type. Then she just had to ruin the effect. She was staring at the person to my left. A person who just happened to have his hand clutched inside Piper's. Reyna opened her mouth, and said a single word.

"Jason?"

**A/N: **_**word count**_**: **_**1267**_** Wow, a lot of you want therapy with Leo! I don't blame you though, he is pretty awesome. Did you like the reunion? It will be finished in the next chapter. Don't worry; Leo and Reyna won't date in this story. (Though they are an awesome couple.) It's just that Reyna is the type of girl Leo falls for, so he had to have some reaction to her looks. Virtual cookies to those who review!**


	4. Leo and Reyna's Funky Jams

Sneaking around isn't really my style. I like to be in the middle of the action, where all the fun is. But I value my sanity (what's left of it anyway) so I couldn't chill with Percy and Annabeth. I know it's been 8 months, but the PDA was rather overwhelming. I _really_ hope they aren't like that all the time.

Frank looked mad at me the whole meeting and Hazel avoided my eyes while sneaking sideways glances. A bit creepy if you ask me. Then there's Jason and Piper. My two best friends. Well, Jason looked extremely preoccupied, and all the campers kept greeting him while looking at me like I was scum. And Piper was moping, because, well, I don't know. Yeah, sure, Reyna was drop- dead gorgeous. But she didn't try to kiss Jason, or even hug him. After she called his name and saw his hand in Piper's, her face became a mask. I saw Percy shoot a few sympathetic glances her way.

The point was, I was on my own. So I decided to get some fresh air. That always seems to work for my Aunt Rosa. Then again, the woman wore a muumuu, so she didn't set the best example. I stealthily (well, stealthily for me) walked around the dinner pavilion and up the huge hill. It seemed like the camp and Field of Mars were on one side of this ridge, while New Rome was on the other. Like after ten years in hell, you get to cross over to the Promised Land. We were all given some lovely maps, but I left mine on my bunk. I don't know how I'll get to sleep tonight. I swear, those "mattresses" are rocks encased in sheets.

Anyway, I was strolling up the ridge. And maybe when I got to the top, I was panting a little. Maybe. Or maybe the view took my breath away. Don't worry; I won't go all cliché on you. But seriously, the city at night was postcard worthy. The street lamps were just floating disks with fire in them, emitting a warm glow. The moonlight slithered paths down the contours of stone archways. Mosaics were half-illuminated. Beauty. Simple beauty.

_Enough being poetic Valdez. Don't be going soft on me_, I thought. There were a few trees scattered across the top of the ridge. Don't ask what kind, I'm not Coach Hedge. But the leaves came down to about four feet of the ground, and the trunk was pretty thick. The grass looked comfy. Ok, I'll just sit and rest for a while, until everyone in my barrack was asleep. That way, I wouldn't need to deal with the distrustful glances and sneers. I walked over to the front of the tree, and promptly fell. My foot got tangled in something, my arms flailed around, and I went down. Something was poking into my stomach, and my hand was crushing something soft.

Gods damn it. A freaking person. I pushed myself off, earning an oomph from my victim. Lovely. My hand was on their face. Now that I was on my butt with my hands behind my back supporting me, I could see who it was. A few shafts of moonlight filtered through the branches onto Reyna's face. Shit. At least my hand was on her face, not, _ahem_, other places.

"Sooo... Hi. Sorry 'bout that," I gulped, and gave a distorted smile. Her mouth seemed to harden.

"I accept your apologies," Reyna replied stiffly. Then, I noticed white ear buds nestled inside her ears. An iPod was laying on her lap. So I guess the Romans gave praetors special privileges.

"Unfair!" I blurted out. She arched an eyebrow, pulling off smoothly what I had tried to do with Piper.

"That praetors get to have iPods," I elaborated.

"Well, with great privilege comes great responsibility. We also have our own houses, but your friend Percy seems to prefer the barracks," Reyna replied. Their _own houses_? Hades yes!

"Coolio. I am so signing up to be praetor! And I don't know Percy that well," I stated.

"Well, you seemed to be doing the same thing as him at the meeting. Sleeping," she narrowed her eyes. Wow. This girl was perceptive. I decided a subject change was in order.

"Whatcha listening to?" I asked. She looked down to her lap, playing with the cord to her earphones.

"How to Save a Life. Overplayed, I know," Reyna bit the sides of her cheeks.

"No, not really. Overplayed would be Taylor Swift," I grinned. She gave a slight smile and flicked a stray hair out of her face.

"I have her on this playlist too." Reyna's voice was slightly frigid. Just slightly.

"Oh," I said. Reyna raised an eyebrow. I hastened to finish my explanation.

"I'm just... a little surprised. I mean, not that's there's anything wrong with that, I love Taylor, but you don't seem the type. Not that you're not girly or anything, you just seem kind of... I don't know. Indie band or something. Very individual, you know? That's cool though," I finished awkwardly and took a deep breath. She probably thinks I'm an idiot now.

But to my immense surprise, Reyna smiled. Probably laughing at me, but whatever.

"We should make a playlist of sad songs," I regretted my words the moment they were out of my mouth. Reyna dropped the smile.

"What makes you think I should listen to sad songs? And why would I want to make a playlist with _you_? I don't know you," she tilted her chin up.

"It could be a bonding exercise?" It came out as a question.

"I don't need to _bond_, thank you," Reyna sneered. We sat in silence for a while. I was about to get up and scamper back to my shitty bed when Reyna spoke again.

"Well, I guess it can't hurt. And I have nothing else to do. But please, no sad songs." I notice she didn't apologize. I guess I'm beneath that.

"Okay. Just hit 'add a new playlist' and we'll scroll through what you've got," I scooted over so my back was against the trunk, but kept a good three inches between us.

"I'm aware of how to make a playlist Leo," she answered. Her extensive music library impressed me. It took us about ten minutes to pick all the best happy songs out of it.

"What's the title?" Reyna asked me. She was no longer frowning.

"How about: Leo and Reyna's Funky Jams. Yeah, I like it," I nodded my head. Reyna curled her lip and raised one eyebrow, but typed in the name nonetheless.

_Leo and Reyna's Funky Jams (26 songs)_

_I Like it Like That_

_You Lie_

_Bad Reputation_

_Domino_

_Don't Trust Me_

_Déjà Vu_

_Waking Up in Vegas_

_Austin_

_Sober_

_U + Ur Hand_

_Take a Back Road_

_Breakaway_

_Hot Mess_

_It Girl_

_Are You Happy Now?_

_Tell Me Why_

_Love Drunk_

_1985_

_High School Never Ends_

_Ain't No Rest for the Wicked_

_Our Song_

_Hard- Knock Life_

_California Gurls_

_Piece of Me_

_Radar_

_The Show_

"Okay. This is pretty epic," I announced. Reyna smiled (she doesn't do that often) and replied,

"Yes, it is Leo. It wasn't as bad as I thought it was be." Then she unfolded her legs, got up, and walked down the hill without a backwards glance. _Wow, maybe I'm not as bad with people as I thought._

**Author's Note: **_**word count (before A/N)- 1241. **_**So, I was thrilled with all the reviews and people who added me to their story alert list! You guys love Leo! And yes CrystalNight39, they are chocolate chip. (::) Here ya go! Extra cookies to daughterofares97, zealousfreak27 and JVpurplie Demi Fairy, who all reviewed more than once! (::) (::) (::) You guys are awesome. This is way longer than I want it to be, but two more things.**

**This is rated T for Teen. So they will act like teenagers. Talking about sex, drugs, rape, and swearing is part of their lives. It won't be anything too intense though**

**This is friendship. Not romance. I love Reyna, and think she belongs with Leo, but it's not going to be in this story. Sorry!**

**Oh, I love Taylor Swift by the way. Now review, and carry on with your lives!**


	5. The Kid with the Teddy Bear

When I woke up the next morning, it wasn't because my so-freaking-amazing musical alarm clock (which I still haven't gotten around to putting playlists on) went off.

Some jerk had slapped me across the face. I snapped my eyes open and sat up like someone had just poked me with a cattle prod (and I know what that feels like from experience). My vision was filled with oddly shaped black dots. I shook my head like a wet dog until the dots cleared. The grinning face of Jason swam into focus. I narrowed my eyes.

"What the Hades do you think you're doing?" I growled good-naturedly. His grin just widened.

"It's Pluto here. We are in _my_ territory, now. And breakfast starts in five minutes," he shoved me on the shoulder and walked out of the dim barracks. I looked around; everyone else was pulling on socks or putting on deodorant. Apparently, the concept of sleeping in was lost upon Romans. I checked my so-freaking-amazing clock. _7:45_. Freaking Jupiter, how could Jason be so disgustingly cheery at such an obscene hour?

Sometimes, I hate my best friend.

Anyway, I grabbed a neon orange Camp t- shirt (who came up with that color? It's like a billboard for monsters), and some frayed jean shorts. I pulled on a mismatched pair of white socks (who even inspects your socks?) and rubbed some Old Spice in my pits. Then I headed to the community sink and scrubbed my teeth. You're welcome, ladies. I shoved on my pre–tied sneakers, decided my hair was a lost cause, and walked through the heavy wooden door. The sun was so bright I had to squint. I guess Apollo was in a good mood. That was when I realized I had no idea where the dining pavilion was. Damn it. Seriously, these Romans with their fancy _roads_ need maps. After I glanced side to side for a few minutes, debating which path to take, it came to my attention that dozens of people were walking in the same direction. Well, that's my problem solved. As I followed the flow to food, I kept a look out for anyone I knew. Which, come to think of it, was only about five people. Finally, I spotted a dark braid swinging over most heads. There was a three- foot radius around her. Looks like I spotted our favorite praetor. Jogging and elbowing through the crowd, I caught up with her.

"Hey, Reyna," I was only panting slightly. Reyna's mouth stiffened.

"Hello, Leo," she answered in a monotone. Choosing to ignore the iciness and stares, I pushed on with the conversation.

"What are you planning on eating?" I asked.

"Why are my eating habits your concern?" she kept staring straight ahead. A few snickers ran through the people nearest us. I felt my neck get hot, but luckily my hair hid that.

"Well, I just wanted to know what was good around here. Make sure you don't poison the pancakes," I defended myself.

"We don't poison the pancakes. But watch out for the sausage," she replied. I'm pretty sure the corners of her mouth twitched upwards. I entered a shock-

induced silence. Reyna, cracking a joke? The world might be ending. When we finally reached the wide marble steps, she nodded at me and turned left. Great. I was just ditched. I scanned the tables and found Percy sitting next to Annabeth. Thankfully, they weren't attached at the mouth. I slid onto the bench next to him.

"Hey guys," I said. Annabeth smiled and greeted me with a "Hey." But Percy only nodded. His eyes were slightly glazed. Guess I'm not the only one who thought breakfast time was ridiculous. I yawned then stretched my arms, hitting some random passerby in the stomach. They stopped and glared at me. It was some tall and skinny blond kid, with messy blond hair. But what really got me was the teddy ear he was clutching. I saw Percy sit up straighter from the corner of my eye.

"Umm, sorry for hitting you. Why are you carrying that bear?" I asked hesitantly. Maybe he had a mental disorder. The kid's scowl deepened.

"I am Octavian," he announced like I should already know who he was.

"Well, okay Octavian. It's okay to like stuffed bears. There are plenty of people missing you right now though, so shouldn't you run back to the infirmary?" I said in a kind tone. The kid's back stiffened and his scowl deepened.

"This is no stuffed bear. _This_ is the _future_!" his eyes widened, giving him a crazed look. This guy was a freaking nutcase.

"Um, whatever you say, Octavian. Help! Any doctors around? I think we have a camper with a head injury!" I called, glancing around for help. Most of the people within earshot started snickering, but a few looked indignant. I felt Percy shaking with laughter behind me. Octavian looked indignant.

"I am the augur for Camp Jupiter! Your actions will not go unpunished!" he shrieked. Whoops. The entire pavilion went quiet. Dinner and a show. Don't forget to tip your nymphs.

"Umm, yeah, like, I'm really sorry dude-" I started apologizing, but Octavian cut me off.

"Do you have any idea how important I am? I am a descendant of Apollo, god of the sun himself! You will be cursed!" he heaved in huge gulps of air.

"Descendant? As in son?" I asked, eyebrows furrowing. He stomped the ground like a bull.

"No! My great- grandfather was the son of Apollo! I am his legacy!" he screamed, chest puffing out.

"Wouldn't that make you less powerful? I mean, your godly blood would be diluted," I stated reasonably. Octavian was too enraged for words. He lifted the bear and was about to chuck it at my beautiful face when a gold dagger appeared on his right wrist. Reyna had crept behind him.

"Now, Octavian, let's be reasonable. He states valid points. He only has been at this camp for a day. He cannot be expected to know all our customs. After all, he is a Greek," she said, lip curling on _Greek_. "And to outsiders, a fifteen year-old boy walking around carrying a teddy bear does seem strange." Reyna's dark eyes sparkled with amusement. Percy's shaking got even harder next to me. Octavian pouted.

"He should know our customs, they are very important. But since you, Praetor Reyna, order me to, I will not attack. And it is _not_ strange," he whirled around and stormed off, his teddy bear bouncing against his leg.

"I _cannot believe_ you called Octavian insane. Oh, this is great," Percy was gasping for air but had a smile plastered across his face.

"I'm guessing you're not a fan?" I said shrewdly.

"No, he's not. Neither am I, for that matter. But be careful, Octavian has a lot of power in this camp," Reyna warned. Percy snorted.

"Please. _I_ became praetor, didn't I?" Reyna nodded slowly.

"You did. Enjoy your breakfast. Stay away from those sausages, Leo," her mouth definitely twitched this time. Percy's mouth was hanging open.

"That was possibly the most emotion I have ever seen her use at once. And what's wrong with sausage?" he said, spearing one and shoving it in his mouth. I smirked (having practiced in the mirror).

"It's poisoned."

_**word count: 1223**_

**Author's Note: I am **_**so**_** sorry. Seriously. Please don't hate me. I had such bad writer's block, and then I forgot how to write Leo's character. Like, this chapter didn't turn out the way I planned **_**at all**_**. Anywho, don't you love Octavian's grand entrance? I hate him so much :). But I always felt that Leo would inadvertently screw with him.**


	6. There Goes my Future Career

**The story starts to earn it's T-rating in this chapter. Thou hath been warned.**

I really hate Senate meetings.

I thought war councils at Camp Half-Blood were bad enough, and those had nachos and hot chocolate. The Roman senate building had marble benches to sit in and hundreds of purple-y (is everything at the frigging camp purple?) ghosts glaring at me. I was squeezed in between Piper and Annabeth. Reyna and Percy were sitting in fancy chairs at the front of the room, with Octavian hovering nearby like a serial killer. Percy kept shifting in his seat and making faces at Annabeth and I, who were snickering at the purple (of course) bed sheet he had tangled around him. Reyna, on the other hand, had one arm laid across each armrest, and calmly stared out at the building's occupants. I couldn't help but notice that she avoided the spot where Jason and Piper sat a bit closer than necessary. My eyes glazed over as they had the same argument they had been having the past three days. _Who should go on the quest? _Reyna, Jason, Octavian? _Were the Greeks trustworthy? _Thank the gods we hadn't brought the Stolls along. After three hours, I felt Annabeth slap my arm. I slowly got to my feet, wincing as I discovered my butt had fallen asleep. Unsure of what to do, I trailed after Annabeth as she climbed the three steps to the dais Percy's chair was on. He was attempting to stand up, but kept stepping on the inside of the bed sheet and falling back down. Reyna stood ramrod straight and made no move to help, though she did look somewhat amused. Annabeth rolled her eyes and yanked Percy up, then ripped the bed sheet off his shoulders. He heaved a sigh of relief.

"I love you Annabeth," he smiled, leaning backwards and cracking his back. Annabeth wrinkled her nose at the noise.

"Ugh, those meetings give me a headache!" Percy complained. Reyna smirked.

"Must be the sausages." She strode out, her sheet billowing behind her. Maybe it was a trick of the light, but I could have sworn I saw her wink at me.

OooooOooooO

I couldn't fall asleep that night. I rolled over onto my stomach and squinted at my awesome-sauce clock. _11:14. _Lovely. And Jason is going to wake me up at some gods-awful hour tomorrow morning, too. My life just sucks sometimes. I decided to head out to that tree where Reyna and I made that playlist last night. And no, I was _not _hoping to see her again! But the grass there was very nice. As I finished climbing the hill and wiping sweat from my upper lip, I spotted a shadow leaning against the tree. Guess I _was_ seeing Reyna tonight.

"Hi," I called out, hoping not to startle her. I saw the dark braid swing slightly right, the only indication she heard me. I panted myself a foot away from he, with my legs straight in front of me and my hands splayed across the soft grass behind me. Reyna, in contrast, had her knees pulled up to her chest and had wrapped her arms around her legs. The white earbuds glowed slightly, being the brightest thing on the hill. She must have saw me staring, because she removed one from her ear and dangled it near my face.

"Listen if you want," she sighed, shaking the earbud. I snatched it and stuffed it into my ear.

'_Why you wanna_

_Show up in a_

_Old t-shirt that I love…' _

"Hmm. What song?" I asked.

"Why You Wanna by Jana Kramer. Her album is being released soon," Reyna replied, still staring straight ahead. I shifted right so I could see what her eyes were fixated on. There was glimmering water and the outline of a dock in the distance.

"Whatcha looking at?" I asked. Reyna sucked in a sharp breath, possibly annoyed with my constant questions.

"Camp Jupiter's marina," she said shortly.

"And… why are you looking there?" I raised my eyebrows. Finally, Rena turned her head to me and rested her cheek on the bark of the tree.

"I was just thinking…" she trailed off.

"About…?" I prompted her.

"The morning I arrived here. My older sister was with me. We had managed to overtake the pirates on the ship we had been prisoners on. Of course, we had no clue how to sail. But the wind just blew us here. It was meant to be, I think. Or I used to," she bit her lip. Somehow, I knew she wasn't just talking about being at this camp.

"So, you had an older sister?" I said, asking the safer question.

"Yes. She is queen of the Amazon warriors now."

"Prestigious," I nodded. Then, a new thought occurred to me.

"What was being on a pirate ship like? Cause I saw Pirates of the Caribbean, and swabbing the deck looked like hard work," I blurted out. The lines of Reyna's face tightened, and she looked away again.

"When you have two teenage girls on a ship of pirates kept prisoner for 200 years… there are worse things then cleaning, Leo." Reyna squinted a little. If I didn't know better, I would have thought tough-as-nails-praetor Reyna was about to cry.

"Umm… I can't think of many things worse than cleaning," I said, remembering the endless sweeping and scrubbing to get the _Argo II_ to pass Annabeth's inspection.

"Can you?" Reyna whispered. For about ten seconds we sat there in silence, me mulling over her words.

'_Out of all of the places, _

_yeah you had to come walking in here_

_and sit down…'_

I heard her take a deep breath, then she took the earphone out of my ear. She stood, and without looking own said, "I best be going to bed. You would do well to sleep too, Leo." For a few minutes, I thought over our conversation, wondering what got her upset. I thought I might have been tactful for once.

_Teenage girls… worse than cleaning…going to bed…_

Oh my holy gods. What Reyna had been implying hit me.

She had been prisoner on a pirate ship, and she had been raped.

_Well, any dreams of me being a therapist are fucked. _I pounded a fist onto what had once been soft grass, but now just felt like metal spikes.

_**Word count before A/N:**_

**Author's Note: Quick update! And you know, Riordan skates over it, but you know what realistically would have happened on that ship.**


	7. I Fail to Kill the Savior of the World

_I knew you were trouble when you walked in,_

_So shame on me_

I didn't sleep that night.

You know, you hear people say that and you kinda think, '_They're being dramatic. They probably passed out at like 4 am_.' Well, I would like to send my most sincere apologies to anyone I ever thought that at, because I truly did not sleep. I watched minutes pass by on my coolio alarm clock, and all I could think about was how badly I just screwed up. Any chances of friendship I had with Reyna were long gone.

But more importantly, I tried to think of ways I could have comforted her had I realized her subtext sooner. And what scared me was that I could not come up with any wise words, even after thinking for hours. I guess that's why I normally leave the brainy stuff to Annabeth.

The only bright spot to my night-turned-morning was being able to shake Jason awake at 6:30 in the morning. Granted, he punched my face before realizing it was me, and then was very confused as to why I was awake before him. I told him some bullshit about getting up to fix something on the _Argo II_, and Jason cut me off before I had time to finish my lie. For some reason, I feel like Reyna hadn't confided in Jason, and I knew it wasn't my secret to tell. In a sick way, it almost made me feel good that she trusted me that much. Then I remembered what she had trusted me with and that good feeling vanished.

I'm sure you're sick of me rambling on very dramatically in the past tense, so fast forward to breakfast.

OooooOooooO

I looked at my bowl of cereal (still not trusting the sausage) and poked it with my spoon. It had gotten all soggy and gross, but I wasn't hungry anyway. Apparently, that is something shocking in itself.

"Leo," Annabeth leaned over the table, "I know that you don't eat as much as _some pigs_, who shall remain nameless, but you normally eat something. What's wrong? You don't need to diet, you're skinny enough as it is."

"Believe me, I have heard it before," I grumbled. "You know, I have abs, they're just not very wide."

Percy snorted. "Come on dude, eat something. How about a nice salad?"

I stared at him in disbelief. "Salad? Are you channeling Demeter or someone?" He crossed his arms defensively.

"Well, salad is extremely nutritious."

"Ignore him," Annabeth interjected. "Ever since Circe turned him into a guinea pig, he's had this weird love of vegetables."

"_Circe_? Like Medea's aunt?" I asked wide-eyed.

"Yeah, she's one of the most powerful sorcerers of all time. Also famous for turning men into pigs, or guinea pigs in modern times," Annabeth recited this like it was out of an encyclopedia.

"We ran into her on a quest when were thirteen. That's actually where I met Reyna," Percy added.

"You met Reyna before coming here?" I said incredulously.

"Yeah, her and her sister Hylla, queen of Amazons, worked as attendants there. Well, until we blew up the island," Percy scratched the back of his neck.

"How did they get to Camp Jupiter if you blew it up?" I asked.

"Oh, we accidently freed these pirates, and they took Reyna and Hylla as prisoners on a boat. Eventually I think she killed them."

"Hold on a damn minute. Pirates?" I put both hands on the table.

"Yep. When I first got here, I couldn't remember Circe's island. But Reyna recognized me. Tried to kill me too, until her psycho dogs told her I knew nothing about the island. She kind of overreacted," Percy took a bite of his eggs.

All the sounds of people eating and laughing faded, replaced by a low buzzing in my ears. My vision blurred until all I could see was Percy, lifting another forkful of eggs into his mouth.

And I lunged.

I stood up so quickly the bench flipped over. I dived across the table, knocking over my soggy cereal. Then I grabbed the fork with Percy's hand still attached to it and tried to drive it into his throat.

OooooOooooO

_My head feels so heavy…_

With tremendous effort, I opened my eyelids. There was a white ceiling overhead. I tried to turn my head sideways, but it hurt my neck too much. Suddenly, a medic appeared above me.

"He's awake."

I heard a whizzing, then the top of my cot started to lift into a sitting position. Annabeth and Jason were in chairs at the foot of my bed. Neither was smiling.

"Why, Leo?" Jason sounded frustrated.

"Why, what?" I asked, my voice hoarse and throat dry.

"Why did you try to kill Percy with a fork?" Annabeth sounded slightly betrayed. Suddenly, all the memories of this morning (was it still this morning) came rushing back into my mind like the light had changed at a highway intersection. My hands started to tremble with suppressed anger. Apparently, the medic noticed because he shook two little white round pills out of a bottle and said,

"Take these."

Seeing no reason to protest, I popped them. Immediately, my body relaxed and my neck muscles felt much less sore.

"I tried to kill him because of what he did to Reyna." My voice was totally flat. It was rather frightening, if I do say so myself.

"Percy never did anything to Reyna," Jason said.

"Yes he did!" I shouted. The medic, who I will now refer to as Bob, gave me a look. Lowering my voice, I continued, "He set all those pirates on Reyna and Hylla. And then they… they… UGH!" My fingers flamed and I grabbed a fistful of sheets and twisted them furiously, taking comfort in the smell of burning cloth. Annabeth and Jason looked both taken aback and scared. They had never seen me get really angry.

"And they… _what_ Leo? What?" Annabeth leaned forward, eyes imploring me to answer the question.

"I can't tell you. If you really want to know, talk to Reyna," I said with barely controlled rage. Jason looked confused, and a bit defensive.

"Look, Reyna's never said anything about pirates-"

"To _you_," I hissed. "Not to _you_. Bob, can you get rid of them? I might need to find another fork otherwise." While Bob looked annoyed at my calling him Bob, he nonetheless reclined my cot and told Jason and Annabeth to leave or risk upsetting me more.

I'm kinda glad that I wasn't able to see their faces as they walked out.

**Word count: 1104  
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**Author's Note: So incredibly sorry for the long wait between updates! It's really inexcusable, but I will make excuses anyway. My summers are really busy, and I have so much homework now it's ridiculous. I hope you enjoyed this chapter (even though you're not really supposed to) and remember to leave reviews! Leo needs them to cheer up. **

**On a side note, a sequel to **_**Walls of Ice**_** is posted, if anyone read that and would like to know the girl's revenge.**


	8. That Octave Dude

_If they give you hell, tell them to fuck themselves._

"How did you know my name?"

"Huh?" I was a little scatterbrained from the fight I just had with my two friends, and could hardly even register that the medic had just asked a question.

"I _said_, how did you know my name was Bob?" The brown-haired boy repeated, looking a tad bit frustrated. I could feel my eyebrows moving up my forehead.

"Wait, your name is actually Bob?" I asked disbelievingly.

"YES! And I want to know how you knew it!" the kid, _Bob,_ hissed. I indulged in a slight happy dance (which in the cot was more of a chest wiggle).

"I didn't! It was just annoying to refer to you as 'the medic' in my thoughts, so I gave you a fake name. And it was your real name! This is epic!" Laughing, I held out my hand for a fist bump. Bob ignored it.

"Calm down, or else I'll have to give you more meds. And that would be an overdose," Bob warned. My happy bubble deflated like a popped balloon. Right, I was in the infirmary. For trying to attack Percy. For causing _her_ to be raped.

I must have made a twisted face, because Bob's eyes softened and he said, "I prefer to be called Bobby, by the way."

"Leo, you have a visitor!"

"Who is it?" I called back. I was absorbed in an intense game of Mario Kart on the Wii station that was included in every infirmary cot. The Romans know how to live it up, I'm telling ya. But instead of Bobby answering my question, the door just swung open.

"Hello," that crazy teddy bear dude, Octave or whatever, walked in uninvited (and totally unwelcome, too, just saying).

"Um, hi," I returned.

"As camp augur, I am here to discuss your little scuffle with praetor Percy Jackson. Of course, the other praetor should be doing this, but she seems rather incompetent," Octave said this with an air of self-importance. My stomach dropped.

"Well, w-what do you want to say?" I stuttered, pausing my game.

"Great job." The lanky kid sprawled out in the chair next to my bed. I was taken aback, and it must have showed. "I don't trust Jackson, and I appreciate one of his _own_ taking a stand."

The way this guy said _own_ made it sound like Greeks were a different species.

"Oh, no, that's not what I was doing! I was just-just…" my defense couldn't be completed. What was I supposed to say? _Defending my kinda-sorta-maybe-friend's honor_? _Being an idiot_?

"No, no, I understand completely," Octave curved his lips in what might have been a smile, but looked more like a snake being choked.

"Actually, I don't think you do-" the blond cut me off.

"Is that Mario Kart? I must say, I'm rather skilled at that game."

"Um, yeah, it is. Do you want to play?" I regretted the words the minute they escaped my mouth. _This guy is a known creep. Why are you sitting here pretending to be friends with him?_

_Well, I don't have any real friends at the moment…_

Okay, I'm having conversations with the voice inside my head. I just reached the boss level of insanity.

Surprisingly, Octave the Uptight was decent at Mario Kart. And he made good company. Our only comments to each other were regarding the game on screen.

It was kinda just what I had needed.

"Okay Leo, you are cleared to leave," Bobby was standing at my bedside, looking very official with a clipboard. It was about eight at night, two days since I got here. I raised a single eyebrow (successfully, might I add). That was not the expected outcome of my examination. "Octavian gave me his word that your stable, and well… his word holds a lot of weight."

Wow. The guy had done something decent. And his name was Octavian. Whoops.

"Well… nice knowing ya Bobby. You were a great medic-person, babysitter, whatever," I grinned and held my hand up for him to shake. He did so, and if I hadn't previously confirmed that I was insane, I might have said his lips twitched. I swung my legs out of the bed, and slipped my feet into the sneakers conveniently left there. Time to do something productive.

…Just kidding. Unless you call making an apology playlist productive. I had to do something to make up for my cluelessness on the hill to Reyna, as well as my misbehavior at breakfast a few days ago. I snuck up the rope ladder on the Argo II and headed to my super-duper control room. I have three awesome high speed Macs in there, clapper lights, a totally rocking- sorry, off topic.

I clicked open iTunes and went straight for the sappy songs. I knew Reyna was a Swifty, so I decided I might as well go for Taylor first. That led to P!nk, who I figured had that strong feminist thing going for her, which led to a few more random songs.

_Back to December_- Taylor Swift

_Innocent_- Taylor Swift

_The Moment I Knew_- Taylor Swift

_There are Worse Things I Could Do_- Grease Soundtrack

_Here's to Us_- Halestorm

_Try-_ P!nk

_Who Knew_- P!nk

_Safe & Sound_- Taylor Swift ft. Civil Wars

_Don't Tell Me_- Avril Lavigne

_Tied Together With a Smile_- Taylor Swift

_Blow Me (One Last Kiss)-_ P!nk

_Merry Go 'Round- _Kacey Musgraves

_Don't Let Me Get Me_- P!nk

_Fucking Perfect_- P!nk

_Catch My Breath_- Kelly Clarkson

Okay, so maybe they weren't all apology songs. But seriously, how many apology songs do you know? And okay, maybe some seemed a bit romantic, but I'm 94% positive Reyna has/had/wants to have a thing with Jason. The only thing left to do was title it. 'Apology Playlist' had no _oomph_ to it whatsoever, and 'Leo's I'm-Really-Fucking-Sorry-I-Screwed-Up Playlist' wouldn't fit in the box. I started spinning circles in my rolly chair and humming a random song. _So ya had a bad day, taken one down, sang a sad song just turn it around… _

Wait. I'm a genius.

'Just Turn it Around'.

**A/N: So yeah. I'm sorry I haven't updated in like two months (which is sadly good for me). Lyrics at top are from **_**Here's to Us**_** by Halestorm, and the song Leo hums is **_**Bad Day**_** by Daniel Powter. If you didn't know that, get out from the rock you're under. Much love to everyone who reviews (50 reviews? Asdjfasdlkjf) even if it's just to complain about my shit updating capabilities. Is anyone else really looking forward to Leo/Nico bonding in House of Hades? Because I am so much that it's scary. And holy heck the book cover art is creepy as… **_**Hades**_**.**


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